Steve had recently introduced me to projection painting and "Bill In The Red" was the second of several paintings using this method. Excited by the possibilities of this approach to deriving imagery, I selected a batch of slides I thought had some compositional and emotional strength. In a collection of some of the worst photographs I've seen, my own, it was lucky that I found something I thought I could work with. I projected this image onto two small canvases each at a different angle, varying the composition while retaining the expression.
The story behind this painting obscures as I research the details of the day. I named it for what I thought was the beginning of one of our Middle Eastern wars and some horrible financial fiasco Bill Clinton had gotten us into. But as I check out the days this was painted I can't find my reasoning. Nevertheless, in my mind it will always be a reflection of our president painfully facing some hair-raising political strife and fully gathering the magnitude and irreversibility of his error.
In fact the image is one I took of Blair lying in his hospital bed in our Bodega livingroom, shortly after returning home from a devastating car accident. Blair wore his vulnerability gracefully in this moment, which was rare. His eyes emanated an archetypal sense of sadness, acceptance and resolve. I came across this photo less than a year after Blair shocked me by withdrawing from my life and our decade-long relationship. I had slammed that door shut fast and tight behind him. Bolstered by the fact that I would be painting rather than sitting in some therapist's office, I thought I might be able to take a peek at what had happened there between us. The project wasn't the least bit helpful in that department, but did make for a painting I continue to enjoy. I find the painting odd and flat. The pale face and melancholic expression nearly fades away into the bright background. I like the tension, between the energized colors in the ground and the faded image. I feel sorry for the fella and want to laugh at his puckered little morose lips at the same time.
There is really no part of this painting that doesn't appeal to me. I like the unexpected triangle of his green shoulder and the painterly stripes in his shirt and collar. His naively painted drawing-face could too easily be an embarrassment but I like its awkwardness. His scratchy head on fire looks vital against the green tinged yellow horizon and tickles my fancy. The red arching space behind him is scrubby and reminds me of well loved used furniture, a grand velvet couch that dwarfs the man. I like the canvas itself, its proportions are just right. The fifteen by twenty inch scale fits the portrait and the inch and three-quarters depth lends it a substantiality. This one could stay with me my whole life and I'd be a happy girl to have it.
